All American Girl vs Injustice: June 2020

Thursday, June 25, 2020

Chapter 11:

All American Girl vs Injustice

Chapter 11:

I’ve been away for a few days for a mental health break. Some of the things I’ve seen posted have just brought me down. I’m trying to wrap my head around the thought that this is an “either or” world. It isn’t. This is an inclusive world and we have to start acting that way. It’s not us vs. them, it’s us vs. us. Seriously, when will we learn? So I took a break and now I’m back. Too bad POC can take a break when this racist nonsense gets them down. (SERIOUSLY READ THE SARCASM IN THAT LAST STATEMENT!)

One of the issues I want to address at this point, is the “new” item going around saying: “People demand the Police get new training. How about training your children to act like they got some damn common sense <sic>” My first response was, you mean when they are walking home minding their own business, or jogging minding their own business, or SLEEPING AFTER A LONG SHIFT AS AN EMT? Then I take it farther.

Let me explain. The police are not judge, jury, and executioner. The job of the police is to protect and serve. Even if the person in custody has actually committed a crime, the police DO NOT GET TO MURDER that person. They are to take the person into custody and let the justice system do its job. Even if the person is screaming obscenities at the police, they DO NOT GET TO KILL THEM. Will there be times that a suspect is killed by the police and is possibly justified? Yes? Maybe the person has an assault weapon and is trying to kill innocent people or even shooting at the cops. Most likely that person is going to be killed and most likely, that person is actually on a suicide mission. *PSA--It is not ok to shoot innocent people or police just because you can.

I’m watching too many videos of simple things escalating because of hot headed cops. *Please remember that I am not anti-police, just anti-bad police. A simple traffic stop of a couple with their two small children ended up with 12 cops on the scene. The 4 year old child allegedly stole a doll from the Dollar Store (or some equivalent). The cops were yelling obscenities at the couple to get out of the car and the couple were afraid. The commands were contradictory, e.g., keep your hands up, but then get out of the car. At one point a cop ran up into the woman’s face screaming at her to “get her f’g hands up.!” She had 1 hand up and was holding her small child in the other. The cop was screaming at her to put the baby on the ground. WHAT?! Come on now what is up with that?

So, the moral of the story is, that everyone deserves their day in court if they have allegedly committed a crime—not to die. Everyone deserves to be able to do their every day thing, running, walking, eating at a restaurant, driving home, SLEEPING. Hhow can you “train them up to have some common sense” when they haven’t (1) had a jury of their peers and/or (2) haven’t done anything?

Think about this. Do you really want to be the person that tells Breonna Taylor’s family that she “should have had common sense?” #sayhername

#vote #blacklivesmatter #JesusSaves #nojusticenopeace #wecandobetter #askthequestions #learntheanswers #stopthemadness #wedontwanttodieyet #educatethemasses #Icantbelievewearestilldoingthis #Education #Compassion #Justice #reallocatenotdefund #timeforachange #tryharder #notanopinion #sayhername

Friday, June 19, 2020

Chapter 10:

All American Girl vs Injustice

Chapter 10:

You may have noticed that I changed the title of these essays from All American Girl vs Racism in America to All American Girl vs Injustice. I’ve decided to make this change, because I have to address all the ‘isms’ not just racism. Not that racism could ever be “just” racism. (Two ways you could read that sentence—choose the right one.)

So, here’s what we’re going to talk about:

1. Racism
2. Sexism
3. Homophobia
4. Immigration
5. DACA/Dreamers
6. Bullying
7. Homelessness
8. Starving children in the world
9. Poverty

I’m not going to stop talking about #blacklivesmatter until they actually do. But, I’m also going to spotlight the other 8 topics because it’s got to be done. We’ve got to stop hating on each other. We’ve got to do something to help each other. We’ve got to do better. I don’t know how to keep saying this. Everyday, before I even open my eyes, I pray to God, “please make it be better today.” And everyday, I get gut punched because people, with their free will, have killed another innocent person. The side in favor of the innocent person protests only to be met with violence. The side in favor of injustice, finds a way to blame the victim and tries to destroy those who are fighting for justice.

I’m going to be writing these essays 2 – 5 times a week. I’m going to make you uncomfortable. I’m going to keep fighting for justice for my family and friends. I’m going to keep fighting to make this world a better place.

I welcome comments and debate and difference of opinion. What I will not welcome and do not tolerate is hatred. I’ve touched on this before—your personal feelings do not equal an opinion. You can have an opinion on your favorite tv show or book, or what you want to eat for dinner tonight. You do not have an opinion when you are oppressing people of other races, ethnicities, religions, sex, gender, sexual orientation, or social status. That, my friends in not opinion but oppression.

Chapter 9:

All American Girl vs Injustice

Chapter 9:

I am struggling today to write anything without blowing my top, using foul language, and just plain calling people out. I want to point out injustice and teach people, and that’s not going to happen if I lose my cool. I also realize that the people who need to hear these things are not listening, but hopefully others, who have been listening, will hear and understand or at least know they are not alone.

So, today I just need to point some things out. I’ve been “unfollowing” people on Facebook because I just can’t keep reading the insane things that they are posting. Believe me, you are entitled to your opinion, but you don’t get to have an opinion about (1) race, (2) religion, (3) sexual orientation and (4) how 1 – 3 are treated. Race and sexual orientation are not a choice. Stop acting like they are. Religion is a personal relationship with God and no one can judge that relationship or beliefs. Just because Christian beliefs differ from Muslim or Hindu or Jewish of Buddhist, doesn’t mean you get to judge. In fact, so-called Christians passing judgement on others is very un-Christian. I’m not judging you, but I am trying to educate you.

Race:

· All races and ethnicities deserve the same equal rights under the law and to be treated fairly and justly without regard to the color of their skin.

Religion:

· People of all religious beliefs deserve the same equal rights under the law and to be treated fairly and justly without regard to their religion.

Sexual Orientation:

· All LGBTQ+ deserve same equal rights under the law and to be treated fairly and justly without regard to their sexual orientation

Why do they deserve this justice and equality? Because they are human beings! I am disheartened to read posts and comments that say otherwise. I even take exception to my Catholic Bishop leaders who are unhappy about the recent supreme court decision. You don’t actually have to like people of other races, religions, or sexual orientation (although all the major religions actually say you do to get to heaven, but that’s a post for another day), but you do have to treat them fairly under the law. Me? I love everyone. I may not like some, but I love them, because Jesus said to “LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR.” I feel like I have to keep repeating myself.

So, where do we go from here? Can we love one another? Can we put our differences aside and become better individuals and communities? Can we make this world a better place for our future generations? I think we can, but we have to #tryharder.

Chapter 8:

All American Girl vs Injustice

Chapter 8:

Today, we go to a story circa 1994, in Van Nuys, California.

As you know by now, my ex-husband is a musician. He would be out at night, usually at the studio recording or creating, and oftentimes didn’t return home until the wee hours of the morning. During the work week, we would see each other in passing—I was headed to work and he was coming home.

In this story, he was coming home “early” (for him) at around 11:00 pm. He had called me from the studio to say he was on his way and should be there in about 20 minutes. (No cell phones yet.) He was driving my car and was about 6 blocks from home when he got pulled over. The police officers made him exit the vehicle and sit on the curb, one with his hand on his gun watching R, the other searching the car. BTW—gave R no reason for pulling him over or for searching the car. R knew the car was clear of any contraband because it’s mine and I would kill him if he had anything in my car. He didn’t argue with the police because he knew it would do no good.

When they were done, the cop told R that he had to stay there (car pulled over on a somewhat busy street) until 6:00 am, when his shift changed. R questioned him, because he didn’t understand what he meant. The cop told him he was to remain in the car, parked on the street until 6:00 am. He could not drive home (6 blocks) or leave the car and walk home until 6:00 am. The cop said he would be cruising by to double check and if he saw that the car was moved or left empty, he would come to the house and lock R up and/or impound MY car.

R waited until 6:05 am to come home and told me what happened. I was pissed! He was too, but I was livid. He didn’t dare fall asleep while sitting there, in case someone tried to jack him or the cops then try to arrest him for something else. I had a sleepless night because he wasn’t home when he said he would be—in those days he was good about letting me know if he was going to be late. I didn’t know if he was dead or in jail or what. My biggest fear in our 25 years together was that he would be killed or jailed and I wouldn’t be able to find out. (I still have that fear for my son, but I have better resources now.)

Keep in mind, at no point during this exchange, did either officer give a reason for (1) pulling him over, (2) searching the car, or (3) forcing him to remain in the car, on the street for 7 hours. We have to do better. No one should live with the fear of being killed or jailed for the color of their skin and their loved ones shouldn’t have to worry that this will happen either. #timeforachange

Chapter 7:

All American Girl vs Injustice

Chapter 7:

What adventures can we talk about today? How about the difference between “defund” and “re-allocation.”

Defund definition (Google search): prevent from continuing to receive funds.

Re-allocation: to apportion or distribute (something) in a new or different way

I touched on this yesterday, but today I have seen and heard so many talking about defunding the police, that I think I need to give this topic its own post.

One of the posts was that defunding the police does not mean eliminate all police funding, and that it means they will be funded, but not overfunded, redistribute the city budget, everyone gets a fair share. Further, it says:

· Police should focus on crimes and criminals

· Police are not mental health counselors

· Police are not social workers

· Police are not medical professionals

· Police are not education specialists

· Police should not be responsible for everything

Well, I hate to tell you this, but police need training of mental health counselors, social workers, medical professionals, and education specialists. They have a dangerous job and without the appropriate training and certification, can have devastating effects. They should not be responsible for everything, but they are responsible for parts of everything.

Think about it. When someone is holding a gun on hostages in a store or bank, you call the police. You need someone who can “reason” with the criminal to protect the lives of those hostages. While there may be a mental health specialist, most of the time it’s the cop on the scene that has to handle this. Are you calling a social worker when a husband is beating the crap out of his wife? No—you call a cop. You get my point (I hope.)

So, instead of saying we need to “defund” the police, how about we re-allocate the funds to the areas of need. Mental health training, social worker training, medical training, education training. We do some of this, but not enough. I really do believe that the “pro-defunders” actually mean reallocate, so let’s get this turned around. Remember, we defunded arts and trade in schools, defunded education, defunded healthcare, defunded other programs. It means THEY HAVE NO MONEY TO DO WHAT NEEDS TO BE DONE. #reallocatenotdefund

Chapter 6:

All American Girl vs Injustice

Chapter 6:

I’m taking a different path today. I want to address some issues that keep coming up since the George Floyd murder came to national attention.

1. For those of you who are shocked by this nonsense and thought “racism” wasn’t really that bad before . . . guess what? It always has been, is, and unfortunately, probably always will be. How do we “make it better?” #Vote #Education #Compassion #Justice

2. For those of you who thought that when we voted in a black president that racism disappeared overnight . . . guess what? It did not. Much of it went underground only to come out even harder in the last election. How do we “make it better?” #Vote #Education #Compassion #Justice

3. For those of you who think we need to defund the police. Are you crazy? (I had a modifier in there before crazy, but I’m trying to keep this clean.) If we defund the police, we will have worse police. We need to create more training, screening, and certifications. How do we “make it better?” #Vote #Education #Compassion #Justice

4. For those of you saying “not all police are bad” or “don’t lump protestors with rioters” . . . you are correct . . . BUT it only takes one, no matter which side, to ruin it for the rest of us. Remember that kid in your 3^rd grade class who wouldn’t stop talking so everyone lost their recess time? That’s what’s happening here on a larger and more important scale. How do we “make it better?” #Vote #Education #Compassion #Justice

5. For those of you glad that police officers are under attack, hurt, maimed, or killed . . . shame on you. Killing an officer for the acts of another is wrong. SIDEBAR: Killing is wrong. Period. No matter who is doing it and why. How do we “make it better?” #Vote #Education #Compassion #Justice

Can we start talking and learning from each other and stop killing each other?

Chapter 5:

All American Girl vs Injustice

Chapter 5:

Today’s memory is a tough one. This incident took place in Bloomington, Indiana circa 1987. My ex-husband (who was my boyfriend at the time) was in a very popular band and we often had people over to our apartment. We played our music loudly and drank a little too much, but we were 21 . . . that’s what you’re supposed to do at that age.

Living in a small apartment building off campus (Indiana University), we didn’t really know our neighbors. People moved in and out constantly, so there was no point really. Maybe if we had taken the time to meet the neighbors, this incident wouldn’t have happened. Then again . . . .

I had just come home from work to find R and a couple of friends hanging out at the apartment. R had a gig that night, so there was some excitement in the air. We always had a great time when he was performing. Shortly after I got home and was changing clothes, there was a KNOCK at the door. Ya’ll know there is a difference between knocking and KNOCKING. R opened the door to four policemen who forced their way into our apartment. It was chaotic with the police yelling at R and his friends to “get on the floor.” (You do remember that R is black? So were his friends.) The guys are trying to cooperate, but the place was small, so getting these big guys space to get on the floor while four other big guys are yelling at them, not to mention me being me and yelling at the police, it was a tense situation.

After a few minutes, things calmed down . . . I should say all the men “calmed down.” I was still livid and screaming at the police. “How dare they come into my home and treat my people like this? What are they doing there? Why did they just barge in? I want names and badge numbers. They had no right to barge in. They had no warrant and they had no cause.”

Finally, they allowed R and his friends to get off the floor and sit down on the couch. R got me to chill out to find out why this happened. It turns out that our new neighbors had seen R and his friends in the apartment earlier, and when they saw me come home thought I was in danger. Afterall, what white girl would have three black men in her house? I flipped out again. “Why wouldn’t they just ask for me when R opened the door? Why wouldn’t they say that the neighbors called in a complaint? Why didn’t they just act like human beings instead of treating R and his friends like crap? Why, when they saw I was upset at their treatment of R and his friends, didn’t they just stop and explain immediately?” Their response? “We’re just doing our job, ma’am.” I didn’t even get an apology from all of this. In fact, I heard one of them mutter something along the lines of “you shouldn’t have all them Ns there anyway.” When I asked what he said, the coward said nothing and left.

Now, before all the police-types jump down my throat, remember (1) I support law enforcement, (2) I know that situations can get “out of control,” (3) I know that domestic violence calls are some of the most dangerous to law enforcement, and (4) I know that your training is insufficient for most situations. Ya’ll good cops who signed up to protect and serve get a raw deal. However, I also believe that most situations can be handled better and this was one of them. I have plenty of family and friends who are law enforcement and I know that not a single one is bad or dirty, but there are bad cops and those are the ones that we focus on. They are the ones tainting your profession.

That said, this situation took place over 30 years ago and we are still doing the same thing today. We have to look at law enforcement training and revamp it. I personally believe that law enforcement training should require more training hours and have more emphasis on psychological fitness, as well as incorporate more stringency to weed out the bad apples before they put on the badge. At another time, I may address the history of law enforcement and how we got to this point, but right now, I’m focusing on education and training. SIDEBAR: Did you know in most places, it takes more training hours to become a hairdresser, cosmetologist, etc. than it does to be come a police officer?

For those not in law enforcement saying “F the police,” I hope that you can see past the bad apples and help to make this situation better. How do you do that? I’ll say it again . . . #vote. Write to your elected officials, march (peacefully) to your government seats, donate to causes to better our lives. Support those who are trying to make the changes. Don’t just make posts on social media and think that will fix the situation. Research and arm yourself with facts. Don’t rely on just one source and don’t rely on Wikipedia. Look at multiple sources and see what they all have to say. Are there one or two that stand out as either controversial or just wrong? Are the sources leaning to one side or the other? Find the sources that report the facts (hard to find these days), not just sources that support your agenda or are totally against your agenda. Use logic, not emotion, and get out there to fight the good fight.

#vote #blacklivesmatter #JesusSaves #nojusticenopeace #wecandobetter #askthequestions #learntheanswers #stopthemadness #wedontwanttodieyet #educatethemasses #Icantbelievewearestilldoingthis

Chapter 4:

All American Girl vs Injustice

Chapter 4:

Today, I want to talk to you today about inadvertent and sometimes blatant remarks in which the average person participates. There are three terms we need to define first: (1) stereotype, (2) prejudice, (3) racism. I’m using simple Googled definitions and providing examples from my own experience.

Stereotype--

Definition: a widely held but fixed and oversimplified image or idea of a particular type of person or thing.

Example: Oh—your husband is black? Is it true what they say . . . “once you go black, you never go back?”

Prejudice—

Definition: preconceived opinion that is not based on reason or actual experience. Example: Oh—your husband is black? Is he a good provider for you?

Racism—

Definition: prejudice, discrimination, or antagonism directed against someone of a different race based on the belief that one's own race is superior.

Example: Oh—your husband is black? I don’t believe in mixed marriages. Why would you want to dilute your white race?

Don’t get these terms mixed up. They are not interchangeable, but they are often incorporated into our thinking to make them so. NONE of these examples are acceptable questions, yet I’ve been asked these, and others like them, over and over again by friends, acquaintances, and total strangers. Seriously? One thing I’ve learned though, with the exception of the out-and-out racist, if you educate people, they stop asking the inappropriate questions. So let’s learn to talk to each other.

#vote #blacklivesmatter #JesusSaves #nojusticenopeace #wecandobetter #askthequestions #learntheanswers #stopthemadness #wedontwanttodieyet #educatethemasses

Chapter 3:

All American Girl vs Injustice

Chapter 3:

Today, I want to share a super scary and sad story with you. This experience took place in the summer of 1984, in Martinsville, Indiana. Now at that time, unbeknownst to me, Martinsville was the “KKK capital of Indiana.” *Note—this is not the “official” KKK capital of Indiana, but it’s how we all have referred to it.

In the summer of 1984, my friend (who eventually became my sister-in-law) and I went to visit her brother (my future husband) at Indiana University, in Bloomington, Indiana. For those of you not from Indiana, Bloomington is where Billy Knight coached basketball for many years and is the setting for the movie, “Breaking Away.” Yes, the Little 500 bicycle race is a real thing.

My friend, M (protecting names again) is a tiny, light-skinned, black woman, with the biggest smile you can imagine and probably 98 pounds soaking wet. She could make you smile just by flashing her smile. She was very kind and loved by everyone. She and I were inseparable for most of my senior year and the summer after. Her brother, R, was attending a special program at IU for the summer, so M and I decided to visit for a weekend. Since I was going to attend IU in the Fall, I thought it would be fun to get to know the lay of the land.

We hopped in the car on a Friday afternoon to head to Bloomington. It was a great road trip until we got hungry and decided to stop at McDonald’s in Martinsville. We lived on McDonald’s back then (cheeseburger, small fries, medium coke = $1.25) . . . who didn’t. As we were sitting in the restaurant, we started noticing people giving us some dirty looks. We were trying to figure out why. No one said a word to us, just glared at us. Finally, one brave man came over and said, “Honey, ya’ll need to leave now. This crowd is getting ready to string you up.” I was appalled! I started to argue with him, but he was very firm, but kind. He said that we were in the wrong place and that this town doesn’t like “her kind” speaking of M. Now you know, I wanted to fight at that point, but M grabbed my arm and said, “Let’s go.” The gentleman walked us to the car and made sure we got out of there safely.

We were both shaking and when we got to IU, told R and his friends the story. Mind you, the special program he was attending was for black youth to prepare them for college life, so everyone there, except me, was black. They all started in at once telling us how we should never stop in Martinsville. It’s the “KKK capital of Indiana.” How could we not know that? Well . . . easy . . . she was 14 and I was 18 and we were naïve. No one had ever told us. We easily could have avoided the situation if we had only known.

But here’s where I got pissed (as if I wasn’t already). Why should we or anyone have to worry about eating a meal in McDonald’s or anywhere for that matter? It’s 1984 not 1963. Our grandparents fought for Civil Rights. We de-segregated schools and businesses. We no longer had “white only” bathrooms and water fountains. Why should we just duck our heads and leave where we aren’t wanted? Their answer? Because we don’t want to die yet. That, my friends, is the bottom line. WE. DON’T. WANT. TO. DIE. YET.

It is now (gulp) 36 years later (I had to check the calculator for that number). I’m 54 and still trying to understand why we have such a blatant outburst of racism. Believe me, there will always be prejudice in the world as we all have some form of it, whether we want to acknowledge it or not. But outright racism . . . the systemic abuse of a particular race to keep them from having the same rights as everyone else . . . has got to stop. Look into your heart and see what you need to do to help stop the madness. Maybe you can’t physically protest or march (I can’t), but we can all do something. Write to your elected officials, tell your family and friends, don’t let people get away with making racists statements and posts . . . most of all #Vote.

#vote #blacklivesmatter #JesusSaves #nojusticenopeace #wecandobetter #askthequestions #learntheanswers #stopthemadness #wedontwanttodieyet

Chapter 2:

All American Girl vs Injustice

Chapter 2:

Lest you think I’m totally hard-hearted, I want to share with you today my own (inadvertent) racism. Let me preface this with some facts. I took some classes in college where we studied how people react to each other. When we first encounter someone, we make several judgements within the first five seconds. We categorize based upon race, gender, sex, sexual orientation, looks, etc. This is not a bad thing in itself. We need that categorization so we are comfortable. For instance, on Saturday Night Live, there is a character named Pat. Everyone is uncomfortable around Pat because there is no definitive sex characteristic. Is this character male or female? When we don’t know which pronoun to use when describing someone, we are uncomfortable. (SIDEBAR: this may not be the best example, because nowadays, there are so many different descriptors and we need to be cognizant of all and use appropriately. I’m not fluent enough on this particular topic to discuss. Someone else can feel free to jump in and explain.)

On with my story . . . when I lived in Chicago, I had my first encounters with Hispanic/Latino people. Growing up in Muncie, Indiana, you were either Black, White, or a combination of the two. There were very few people of other races/nationalities. I can think of three families from that time and I don’t even think I knew anyone Jewish. I don’t even know if we had a Synagogue at that time.

One evening, after choir practice, at church, I went to dinner with one of the young men from the parish. He spoke mostly Spanish and some English, and I spoke absolutely no Spanish. We were able to communicate during dinner. It was challenging, but it was fun. Me being me and wanting to know more about him, asked him the following question: “What part of Mexico are you from?” From the look on his face, you would have thought I shot his dog. He was livid and stood up from the table, saying (loudly), “I’m from El Salvador.” (SIDEBAR: if you know me, you know I’m geographically challenged. Want to beat me in Trivial Pursuit? Ask me geography questions.) I stupidly kept at it. “So, what part of Mexico is that?”

Needless to say, I was treated to a tirade about stereotype, racism, lumping all Hispanics/Latinos into one category, you name it. Luckily, I was still really cute and was able to diffuse the situation. I asked him to (calmly) explain what I had done wrong and how to correct it in the future. I certainly didn’t want to make the same mistake again. He explained that El Salvador is not part of Mexico, that not all Hispanics/Latinos in the US are from Mexico, and that it is insulting to lump them all together. I apologized profusely and I LEARNED from this experience.

I also explained why I thought the way I did so that he would understand that it wasn’t intentional. Me being me, and geographically challenged, explained that I just assumed (remember assume makes an ass out of “u” and “me”) that since Mexico was our neighboring country that anyone Hispanic/Latino was from Mexico. I did say that I knew a lot of Puerto Ricans are on the East Coast and Cubans in Florida, but really wasn’t sure of the difference. I asked him to educate me and he did.

Now, you would think that I would have learned my lesson here, but . . . fast forward 20 years. I’m in Southern California, I work in LA, and I have lots of different ethnicities around me, probably 20 different ones just in my job alone. At a company event, I was hanging out with one of my co-workers. He was born and raised here but speaks fluent Spanish because of his family. He has absolutely no accent when speaking English, but when he is drinking, the heavy accent comes out (mostly on purpose). So, we were boozing it up and I said to him, “You know, you never have an accent until you start drinking. And then, you talk with such a thick Mexican accent, you’d think you were born there.” He laughed (because he knows me) and said, “That’s funny, because I’m Cuban.” Facepalm. Will I never learn? He took it in stride and we still laugh about it today. I got to learn about his family history (his father was a prisoner in Cuba because he defied Castro) and that his wife is actually Mexican, so their kids are “Cubicans” (his word, not mine).

The bottom line is, even those of us who are enlightened make mistakes. Own them and learn from them. Will I make this mistake again? Probably. Will I own it and learn from it? Definitely. Have I learned to ask questions or make comments differently? You betcha!

*Note—throughout this essay, I have referred to Hispanic/Latino. This is because some of my friends identify Hispanic and some Latino. I’ve asked the question many times of how/why they identify in certain ways and received a variety of answers. I can’t possibly keep track of how each person identifies, so I use both.

I hope you’ve learned something from my experience and it’s ok to laugh. Laughter is good medicine.

#vote #blacklivesmatter #JesusSaves #nojusticenopeace #wecandobetter #askthequestions #learntheanswers

Chapter 1:

All American Girl vs Injustice

Chapter 1:

First, I want to be very clear that I do not condone violence toward law enforcement officers nor do I believe that all police are bad. I have nothing but the utmost respect for GOOD LEOs. It’s the few rotten apples the ruin it for everyone. I believe the same thing for the races, genders, sexes, politicians, etc. I believe that people are inherently good, but there are always going to be those who make it harder for the rest of us to live in peace. These few are the ones I’m highlighting to try and bring some justice to this world.

One of the first real-life experiences I had with racism was in the 80s during high school. My boyfriend (K) and I were out with another couple, my best friend (J) and her boyfriend (D). J and I are white and our boyfriends, K and D are black. *Names will not be used as I do not have permission. We went to a party in our neighboring town, Anderson, Indiana, and we were in my car, a 1972 Dodge Dart Swinger. (My hometown peeps will remember that car.) On the way home, K was driving, because he was not drinking and I was “slightly” tipsy.

Shortly after crossing the county line into Delaware County, a deputy pulled us over. J and I were pretty naïve at the time, but K and D were (justifiably) nervous. The deputy shown his bright light into the car, blinding us all and asked for license and registration. K produced his license and I produced the registration. Deputy questioned the name on the registration because it was in my dad’s name. I gave him my license, showing we have the same last name and address. In the meantime, I’m questioning why he pulled us over. I know we weren’t speeding, didn’t run any stop signs, car is running properly, etc. He refused to answer. I questioned over and over. K kept telling me to be quiet so we can leave.

Deputy then said he pulled us over because the car fits the description of one stolen earlier that night. That’s when the light went on and I realized why we were actually being pulled over. Remember the car—1972 Dodge Dart Swinger. To the best of my knowledge, there were not any other cars “fitting that description” in all of Delaware County. So, here it was . . . DWBWWG (driving while black with white girls). Now I’m pissed! I started raising my voice that he was a liar and that he needed to let us leave immediately. He refused and in fact, then told K to get out of the car. I wasn’t having it, so I got out of the car to get in Deputy’s face. Everyone at this point is telling me to get back in the car. (SIDEBAR: yes, I know I wasn’t helping matters, but my righteous 17-year old self didn’t think clearly. Did I mention I was “slightly” tipsy?) Deputy did not like that I got out of the car and kept yelling for me to get back in the car and K to get out. Mind you, K and D were star basketball players for Muncie Central High School, so they couldn’t be in trouble. K had also turned 18 already, so I didn’t want anything on his record.

Since Deputy was putting my registration through the system, I told him he needed to call my uncle while he was at it, because I was reporting him to his boss. Deputy was a bit snotty to me and said we could get a phone call at the jail. I informed him he really didn’t want to do that and he would be better off calling my uncle immediately. As luck would have it, Uncle Jim was on duty that night, so when he called in my registration and said this little girl thinks I’m going to call her uncle, I clearly heard Uncle Jim on the radio saying, “Give those kids back their licenses and registration. Send them home. Leave my niece and my star basketball players alone, and get your ass in here immediately!” (If you’re from Muncie, you will recognize Uncle Jim as the long-term county sheriff, who later went on to become mayor. He wasn’t my blood uncle, but he was my “uncle.”)

We went on our merry way and all was well, but what if I didn’t have recourse to call Uncle Jim? I’ve thought about this incident many times. I’ve thought of the stupid stuff that I did and I’ve thought of what could have happened. These are the stories of nightmares that our Black Community lives through EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. These are things I’ve worried when I was married. Would my husband make it home that night or would I (maybe) get a call from jail or worse, the morgue? I still worry about my son, when he isn’t under my roof, for these very same reasons. This nonsense should not be happening. It shouldn’t have happened to my friends and me in the 80s, and it sure as hell shouldn’t be happening in 2020.

People! We have to do better! Have compassion. Seek peace, but you can’t have peace without justice. Seek justice. Stand in solidarity with your fellow man. Jesus said, “love your neighbor.” He didn’t put disclaimers or modifiers. Neighbor—period. We can make this world a better place for our children and grandchildren, but we have to end the systemic racism. Please! Vote in every election. Do your research and vote good people into office to make better laws and to enforce the laws equitably. (More on voting in another post to come.)

#vote #blacklivesmatter #JesusSaves #nojusticenopeace #wecandobetter

All American Girl vs Injustice

Thursday, June 25, 2020

Chapter 11:

Friday, June 19, 2020

Chapter 10:

Chapter 9:

Chapter 8:

Chapter 7:

Chapter 6:

Chapter 5:

Chapter 4:

Chapter 3:

Chapter 2:

Chapter 1:

Chapter 13:

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